You know that feeling, when you are just settling into something and starting to understand it and then something happens to pull the rug out from under you? Yea, it kind of sucks but you move onward. You do, don’t you, because there really isn’t another choice. I’m not against change, as the old saying goes, it’s as good as a rest, but sometimes I would like things to just stay the way they were. I suppose change is one of those ‘certainties’ in life (alongside death and taxes) and whether we choose to accept that or not is irrelevant. It’ll happen anyway.
Take the seasons for example. As much as we might like to hold on to a favourite time of the year, reality is, it’s moving away every second. Scenery changes, weather changes, lifestyles change. It’s all change. This made me think about how finite our lives are and just how many changes we go through in our existence. Some of these changes are wonderful – changing from being dependant to independent, from inexperienced to wise, from being a parent to a grandparent, from insecurity to confident. Of course, there are changes that are more difficult to cope with, most obvious one to me is the change from a loved one living to a loved one dying. As I said, it’s inevitable.
Every woman changes so much throughout her lifetime. Changes from childhood to adolescence (and all the fun that brings) – moving on to adulthood. There might be changes to their status – from single to married, or vice-versa. Changes in their bodies – the time a girl becomes a woman. This can be a trying time. Hormonal changes, mood swings, bodily aches, and of course, the cyclical change that happens every month. For some, the next change is cherished. Change from ‘me’ to ‘Mum’. I have totally enjoyed this change – it has given me great pleasure to nurture my children into adulthood. I learnt many things about myself. I began to like myself. I learned how to appreciate the power of a woman isn’t in her looks, it’s in her strength, her passion, her empathy and the smile behind her eyes. This change has been slowly evolving but I feel that I want to hold on to it, after all, I’m only just beginning to understand what makes ‘me’ me!
Mother Nature, on the other hand, has a different plan. She’s thrown another change at me and it’s one I’m not sure of. I wonder about how things will change, not just physically, but emotionally and mentally too. The menopause is one of those subjects that people try to steer clear of – there are questions that need asking but do we really want to know the answers? Will it change a woman’s personality? Will she still be able to show off her nurturing skills or will she face an attitudinal change and decide to reinvent herself? Will it increase confidence or push us back to uncertainty? One thing is for sure, change is happening again. It is within us all to decide whether to embrace our new self or not. I read a lovely metaphor for the transformation gained from menopause – linking it to the creation of a butterfly…
I’m ready for my new wings.
A cocoon is, in a way, a place of rest, almost a place of death, for it is a place where some creatures go in order to die out of their previous form. Thus it is also a place of rebirth, a place from which the new form, in its own time will emerge.”